410 Games Neste/Magister SuperGames.iso/puzzle/Cryptograms/crypto2.dat

Text File | 1996-09-19 | 29.6 KB | 557 lines

#...poetry, like chastity, can be carried too far. -- Mark Twain
#A bird in the bush usually has a friend in there with him.
#A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
#A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.
#A boss with no humor is like a job that's no fun.
#A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
#A dean is to a faculty as a hydrant is to a dog. -- Alfred Kahn
#A fail-safe circuit will destroy others. -- Klipstein
#A fool and his money stabilize the economy.
#A home where the buffalo roam... is messy.
#A kid'll eat the middle of an Oreo, eventually.
#A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction.
#A man without a woman is like a fish without gills.
#A penny saved is an economic breakthrough.
#A quarter ounce of chocolate equals four pounds of fat.
#A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.
#A wedding is a funeral where a man smells his own flowers.
#A young child is a noise with dirt on it.
#Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
#Absence makes the heart grow fonder... for someone else.
#Academy: A modern school where football is taught.
#Actors will happen in the best-regulated families.
#Advanced design: Upper management doesn't understand it.
#Adventure is a sign of incompetence. -- Amundsen
#Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.
#Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.
#All generalizations are useless, including this one.
#All new: Parts not interchangeable with previous model.
#All signs in metric for the next 20 miles. -- road sign in Ohio
#All the men on my staff can type. -- Bella Abzug
#Always leave room to add an explanation if it doesn't work out.
#Always remember that you are unique... just like everyone else.
#Ambiguity: Telling the truth when you don't mean to.
#Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
#An apple a day keeps the doctor away... if it is aimed well.
#An apple a day makes 365 apples a year. -- Tom Weller
#An apple every eight hours keeps three doctors away.
#An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
#An informed citizen panics more intelligently.
#An object at rest will always be in the wrong place.
#Antonym: The opposite of the word you are trying to think of.
#Any country with "democratic" in the title isn't. -- Murray
#Any landing you can walk away from is a good one.
#Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
#Apart from the unknowns, everything is obvious. -- James Hogan
#Appearances are not everything; it just looks like they are.
#Arguments with furniture are rarely productive.
#Art is anything you can get away with. -- Marshall McLuhan
#Bachelor: A guy who is footloose and fiancee-free.
#Bachelor: A man who never made the same mistake once.
#Ban the bomb. Save the world for conventional warfare.
#Barium: What doctors do when treatment fails.
#Baseball is to football as Beethoven is to rap. -- Patrick Mott
#Be braver -- you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
#Be content with what you've got, but be sure you've got plenty.
#Best gift for the person who has everything: A burglar alarm.
#Bigamy is having one spouse too many. Monogamy is the same.
#Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
#Bore: A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
#Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
#Broad-mindedness: The result of flattening high-mindedness out.
#Bureaucracy: A method of transforming energy into solid waste.
#Bureaucrat: A person who cuts red tape sideways. -- J. McCabe
#Business will be either better or worse. -- Calvin Coolidge
#But officer, I stopped for the last one, and it was green!
#Capitalism is based on the assumption that you can win.
#Cauterize: Made eye contact with a woman.
#Charity: A thing that begins at home and usually stays there.
#Chemicals: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made.
#Circle: A line that meets its other end without ending.
#College isn't the place to go for ideas. -- Hellen Keller
#Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious. -- Peter Ustinov
#Committees do harm merely by existing. -- Freeman Dyson
#Computers are useless; they can only give answers. -- Picasso
#Conservative: A Liberal who has just been mugged.
#Consultation: Medical term meaning "to share the wealth."
#Could you be a poster child for retroactive birth control?
#Death has been proven to be 99% fatal to laboratory rats.
#Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
#Design simplicity: Developed on a shoe-string budget.
#Dinner is ready when the smoke alarm goes off.
#Diplomacy: The art of letting someone else have your way.
#Disco is to music what Etch-A-Sketch is to art.
#Distinctive: A different color or shape than our competitors.
#Do married people live longer, or does it just seem that way?
#Do not merely believe in miracles; rely on them. -- Finagle
#Don't be humble... you're not that great. -- Golda Meir
#Don't force it, get a larger hammer. -- Anthony
#Don't get stuck in a closet; wear yourself out.
#Don't hit a man when he's down -- kick him; it's easier.
#Don't lend people money... it gives them amnesia.
#Don't mind him; politicians always sound like that.
#Don't say yes until I finish talking. -- Darryl Zanuck
#Don't steal. The government hates competition.
#Don't sweat the petty things -- just pet the sweaty things.
#Don't undertake vast projects with half-vast ideas.
#Don't use no double negatives, not never.
#Don't you have anything more useful you could be doing?
#Drive carefully. We are overstocked. -- sign in junkyard
#Dying is easy. Comedy is difficult.
#Earn cash in your spare time -- blackmail your friends
#Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow they may make it illegal.
#Education helps earning capacity. Ask any college professor.
#Egotism: Doing a crossword puzzle with a pen.
#Elections come and go, but politics are always with us.
#Electricity comes from electrons; morality comes from morons.
#Eliminate government waste, no matter how much it costs!
#Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
#Everything in moderation, including moderation.
#Everything is actually everything else, just recycled.
#Everything is always done for the wrong reasons. -- O'Brian
#Everything put together falls apart sooner or later. -- Simon
#Everything worthwhile is mandatory, prohibited, or taxed.
#Everything you know is wrong, but you can be straightened out.
#Exceptions prove the rule, and wreck the budget. -- Miller
#Exclusive: We are the only ones who have the documentation.
#Famous last words: Don't worry, I can handle it.
#Field tested: Manufacturing doesn't have a test system.
#Foolproof operation: No provision for adjustment.
#Fools rush in -- and get the best seats in the house.
#Form follows function, and often obliterates it.
#Fortune favors the lucky. -- Tom Weller
#Fossil flowers come from the Petrified Florist.
#Four wheel drive: Lets you get more stuck, further from help.
#Freedom is just chaos, with better lighting. -- Alan Foster
#Friends: People who know you well, but like you anyway.
#Genius is the infinite capacity for picking brains.
#Gentleman: Knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
#Give a skeptic an inch and he'll measure it.
#Give me a sleeping pill and tell me your troubles.
#Give your very best today. Heaven knows it is little enough.
#Go away. I'm all right. -- last words of H. G. Wells
#God, I ask for patience -- and I want it right now!
#Good day for a change of scene. Repaper the bedroom wall.
#Graft: An illegal means of uniting trees to make money.
#Gravity: What you get when you eat too much and too fast.
#Grub first, then ethics. -- Bertolt Brecht
#Hangover: The wrath of grapes.
#Happiness is having a scratch for every itch. -- Ogden Nash
#Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
#Having children will turn you into your parents.
#He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.
#He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
#He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.
#He who hesitates is probably right.
#He who is content with his lot probably has a lot.
#He who laughs last didn't get the joke.
#He who shouts the loudest has the floor. -- Swipple
#Heat expands: In the summer the days are longer.
#Help stamp out and abolish redundancy.
#Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
#How come wrong numbers are never busy?
#How many weeks are there in a light year?
#How much sin can you get away with and still go to heaven?
#How wonderful opera would be if there were no singers.
#Human beings were created by water to transport it uphill.
#Humor is the best antidote to reality.
#I am a Libra. Libras don't believe in astrology. -- Al Hibbs
#I am going to live forever, or die trying! -- Spider Robinson
#I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat. -- Will Rogers
#I bet you have never seen a plumber bite his nails.
#I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.
#I do desire we may be better strangers. -- Shakespeare
#I have been in more laps than a napkin. -- Mae West
#I know on which side my bread is buttered. -- John Heywood
#I love mankind... It's people I hate. -- Schulz
#I used to be indecisive; now I'm not sure. -- GRAFFITI
#I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. -- Mae West
#I will always love the false image I had of you.
#I will meet you at the corner of Walk and Don't Walk.
#I would give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
#I would like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
#I'm in Pittsburgh. Why am I here? -- Harold Urey
#Ice cream cures all ills. Temporarily. -- Seleznick
#If at first you do succeed, try to hide your astonishment.
#If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
#If entropy is increasing, where is it coming from?
#If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.
#If God is perfect, why did he create discontinuous functions?
#If I had any humility I would be perfect. -- Ted Turner
#If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?
#If it is worth doing, it is worth doing for money.
#If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
#If it pours before seven, it has rained by eleven.
#If it wasn't for lawyers, we wouldn't need them.
#If little else, the brain is an educational toy. -- Tom Robbins
#If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will. -- Silverman
#If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.
#If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex? -- Art Hoppe
#If this saying did not exist, somebody would have invented it.
#If time heals all wounds, how come bellybuttons don't fill in?
#If you are seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
#If you can survive death, you can probably survive anything.
#If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
#If you cannot convince them, confuse them. -- Harry S Truman
#If you do a job too well, you will get stuck with it. -- Slous
#If you don't care where you are, then you aren't lost.
#If you don't know what you're doing, do it neatly.
#If you have half a mind to watch TV, that is enough.
#If you have kleptomania, you can always take something for it.
#If you have to ask how much it is, you can't afford it.
#If you mess with a thing long enough, it will break. -- Schmidt
#If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys. --James Goldsmith
#If you put it off long enough, it might go away.
#If you want to know how old a man is, ask his brother-in-law.
#If you want to put yourself on the map, publish your own map.
#If you were to ask me this question, what would my answer be?
#If your parents didn't have any children, neither will you.
#Ill-bred children always display their pest manners.
#Immigration is the sincerest form of flattery. -- Jack Paar
#In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved. -- Butler
#In order to get a loan you must first prove you don't need it.
#In this world, truth can wait; she is used to it.
#Insanity is inherited; you get it from your kids!
#Institute: An archaic school where football is not taught.
#It ain't loafing unless they can prove it. -- Dick Brown
#It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations.
#It doesn't matter whether you win or lose -- until you lose.
#It is bad luck to be superstitious. -- Andrew Mathis
#It is better to give than to lend, and it costs about the same.
#It is better to have loved and lost -- much better.
#It is better to have loved and lost than just to have lost.
#It is difficult to soar with eagles when you work with turkeys.
#It is kind of fun to do the impossible. -- Walt Disney
#It is more than magnificent -- it is mediocre. -- Sam Goldwyn
#It is not a good omen when goldfish commit suicide.
#It seems to make an auto driver mad if she misses you.
#It was a book to kill time for those who liked it better dead.
#It was a brave man that ate the first oyster.
#It's not hard to meet expenses; they are everywhere.
#Job placement: Telling your boss what he can do with your job.
#Journalism is literature in a hurry. -- Matthew Arnold
#Justice: A decision in your favor.
#Keep America beautiful. Swallow your beer cans.
#Keep stress out of your life. Give it to others instead.
#Kleptomaniac: A rich thief.
#Knocked; you weren't in. -- Opportunity
#Know thyself -- but don't tell anyone.
#Know what I hate most? Rhetorical questions. -- Henry Camp
#Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
#Laugh, and the world ignores you. Crying doesn't help either.
#Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
#Learning at some schools is like drinking from a firehose.
#Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
#Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
#Liberal: A Conservative who has just been arrested.
#Life -- love it or leave it.
#Life is a game of bridge -- and you have just been finessed.
#Life is complex. It has real and imaginary parts.
#Life is difficult because it is non-linear.
#Life is fraught with opportunities to keep your mouth shut.
#Life is like a maze in which you try to avoid the exit.
#Life is like an analogy.
#Life is not for everyone.
#Life is uncertain, so eat dessert first.
#Life is wasted on the living.
#Life: A brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.
#Little things come in small packages. -- Tom Weller
#Live fast, die young, and leave a good looking corpse.
#Living on Earth includes an annual free trip around the Sun.
#Logic is a little bird, sitting in a tree, that smells AWFUL.
#Logic is a means of CONFIDENTLY being wrong.
#Love does not make the world go around, just up and down a bit.
#Love is being stupid together.
#Love is Grand... Divorce is Twenty Grand.
#Love means having to say you're sorry every five minutes.
#Love means nothing to a tennis player.
#Love thy neighbor: Tune thy piano.
#Love your enemies. It will make them crazy.
#Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage.
#Love: The only game that is not called on account of darkness.
#Maintain thy airspeed, lest the ground rise up and smite thee.
#Majority: That quality that distinguishes a crime from a law.
#Make a firm decision now... you can always change it later.
#Man who falls in blast furnace is certain to feel overwrought.
#Mankind has never reconciled itself to the ten commandments.
#Many a family tree needs trimming.
#Many are called, but few are at their desks.
#Many are cold, but few are frozen.
#Many quite distinguished people have bodies similar to yours.
#Marriage is a rest period between romances.
#Marriage is a trip between Niagra Falls and Reno.
#Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.
#Marriage is the sole cause of divorce.
#Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
#Maturity is a high price to pay for growing up.
#May you die in bed at 95, shot by a jealous spouse.
#May you have many friends and very few living enemies.
#Men seldom show dimples to girls who have pimples.
#Michelangelo would have made better time with a roller.
#Millihelen: The amount of beauty required to launch one ship.
#Modern man is the missing link between apes and human beings.
#Modesty is a vastly overrated virtue. -- J. K. Galbraith
#Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.
#Money DOES talk -- it says goodbye.
#Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
#Money is the root of all evil, and man needs roots.
#Monotony: The practice of having only one spouse at a time.
#Mother is the invention of necessity.
#Mother told me to be good, but she has been wrong before.
#Mountain range: A cooking stove used at high altitudes.
#Mummy: An Egyptian who was pressed for time.
#Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel.
#Narcolepulacy: The contagious action of yawning.
#Necessity is a mother.
#Neckties strangle clear thinking. -- Lin Yutang
#Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow.
#Never eat anything bigger than your head. -- Kliban
#Never have any children, only grandchildren. -- Gore Vidal
#Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
#Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.
#Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself. -- Hartley
#Never verb your nouns.
#New: Different color from previous model.
#Nice guys don't finish nice.
#No guts, no glory.
#No maintenance: Impossible to fix.
#No man is an island, but some of us are long peninsulas.
#No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
#No one gets too old to learn a new way of being stupid.
#No problem is so large it can't be fit in somewhere.
#Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.
#Nobody knows the trouble I have been.
#Nondeterminism means never having to say you are wrong.
#Nonsense. Space is blue and birds fly through it. -- Heisenberg
#Nostalgia just isn't what it used to be.
#Nothing can be done in one trip. -- Snider
#Nothing increases your golf score like witnesses.
#Nothing is finished until the paperwork is done.
#Nothing is impossible or impassable if you have enough nails.
#Nothing recedes like success. -- Walter Winchell
#Now and then an innocent person is sent to the Legislature.
#Nuclear war would really set back cable. -- Ted Turner
#Nudists are people who wear one-button suits.
#Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable. -- Plato
#Of course I am happily married -- she's happy, and I'm married.
#Often it is fatal to live too long. -- Racine
#Old MacDonald had an agricultural real estate tax abatement.
#Omniscience: Talking only about things you know about.
#Once upon a time, charity was a virtue and not an organization.
#One Bell System -- it sometimes works.
#One child is not enough, but two children are far too many.
#One good turn usually gets most of the blanket.
#One size fits all: Doesn't fit anyone.
#One thing leads to another, and usually does.
#Only adults have difficulty with childproof caps.
#Only fools are quoted. -- Anonymous
#Only through hard work and perseverance can one truly suffer.
#Only two groups of people fall for flattery: Men and women.
#Our parents were never our age.
#Our policy is, when in doubt, do the right thing. -- Roy Ash
#Out of the mouths of babes does often come cereal.
#Outpatient: A person who has fainted.
#Outpatient: A person who has fainted.
#Paper is always strongest at the perforations. -- Corry
#Paradox: An assistant to PhDs.
#Parallel lines never meet unless you bend one or both of them.
#People have one thing in common: They are all different.
#People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw parties.
#People who take cat naps usually don't sleep in a cat's cradle.
#People will buy anything that is one to a customer. -- Lewis
#Perfect guest: One who makes his host feel at home.
#Perfect paranoia is perfect awareness.
#Philosophy: Unintelligible answers to insoluble problems.
#Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the Earth. -- Don Marquis
#Politics consists of deals and ideals.
#Politics: The art of turning influence into affluence.
#Positive: Being mistaken at the top of your voice.
#Power means not having to respond.
#Predestination was doomed from the start.
#Preudhomme's Law of Window Cleaning: It's on the other side.
#Pro is to con as progress is to Congress.
#Professor: One who talks in someone else's sleep.
#Proofreading is more effective after publication. -- Barker
#Proximity isn't everything, but it comes close.
#Pushing 40 is exercise enough.
#Quality assurance doesn't.
#Question Authority... and the Authorities will question you!
#Quinine is the bark of a tree; canine is the bark of a dog.
#Quit working and play for once!
#Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research.
#Rainy days and automatic weapons always get me down.
#Reality is for people who lack imagination.
#Refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
#Reputation: What others are not thinking about you.
#Rugged: Too heavy to lift.
#Sacred cows make great hamburger.
#Sailing: A form of mast transit.
#Schroedinger's cat might have died for your sins.
#Science is material. Religion is immaterial.
#Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
#Seek simplicity -- and distrust it. -- Alfred Whitehead
#Serendipity: The process by which human knowledge is advanced.
#Serving coffee on aircraft causes turbulence.
#She walks as if balancing the family tree on her nose.
#Silly is a state of mind. Stupid is a way of life.
#Socialism is based on the assumption that you can break even.
#Some is good, more is better, too much is just right.
#Some men are discovered; others are found out.
#Some people who can, should not.
#Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. -- Sigmund Freud
#Sorry, but my karma just ran over your dogma.
#Spare no expense to save money on this one. -- Samuel Goldwyn
#Speed is n subsittute fo accurancy.
#Spelling is a lossed art.
#Spinster: A bachelor's wife.
#Stealing a rhinoceros should not be attempted lightly.
#Stock item: We shipped it once before and we can do it again.
#Stop committing useless mistakes. Make your next mistake count!
#Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
#System-independent: Works equally poorly on all systems.
#Tact: The unsaid part of what you are thinking.
#Take everything in stride. Trample anyone who gets in your way.
#Teamwork is essential; it allows you to blame someone else.
#Technique: A trick that works.
#Terrorists blow up celluloid factory... No film at 11.
#Thank you for observing all safety precautions.
#That that is is that that is not is not.
#The best cure for insomnia is a Monday morning. -- Sandy Cooley
#The best way to inspire fresh thoughts is to seal the envelope.
#The bigger they are, the harder they hit.
#The chief cause of problems is solutions.
#The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
#The death rate on Earth is: One per person.
#The decision does not have to be logical; it was unanimous.
#The fact that it works is immaterial. -- Ogborn
#The famous politician was trying to save both his faces.
#The fewer the data points, the smoother the curve. -- May
#The first myth of management is that it exists. -- Heller
#The first rule of gun fighting is -- bring a gun.
#The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar.
#The general direction of the Alps is straight up.
#The highway of life is always under construction.
#The law of gravity was enacted by the British Parliament.
#The meek shall inherit the Earth after we are done with it.
#The mosquito is the state bird of New Jersey. -- Andy Warhol
#The most dangerous part about playing cymbals is near the nose.
#The optimum committee has no members. -- Norman Augustine
#The other line always moves faster.
#The other line always moves faster.
#The past is another country; they do things differently there.
#The plural of "musical instrument" is "orchestra".
#The prairies are vast plains covered by treeless forests.
#The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
#The Pyramids are a range of mountains between France and Spain.
#The richer your friends, the more they will cost you.
#The Schizophrenic: An Unauthorized Autobiography.
#The second best policy is dishonesty.
#The Society of Independent People has no members.
#The trouble with political jokes is that they get elected.
#The weather at home improves as soon as you go away. -- Gomme
#The wind blows harder in the summer so the sun sets later.
#The word today is legs... Spread the word.
#The zebra is chiefly used to illustrate the letter Z.
#There are more old drunkards than old doctors.
#There is at least one fool in every married couple.
#There is intelligent life on Earth, but I am just visiting.
#There is no future in time travel.
#There is no problem a good miracle can't solve. -- Shick
#There is no time like the pleasant.
#There is nothing more permanent than a temporary tax.
#There is nothing wrong with abstinence, in moderation.
#There is nothing you can do that can't be done.
#There is so much to say, but your eyes keep interrupting me.
#They also surf who only stand on waves.
#Things are more like they used to be than they are now.
#Things equal to nothing else are equal to each other.
#This statement is in no way to be construed as a disclaimer.
#Those who can, do; those who can't, simulate.
#Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
#Time flies when you don't know what you are doing.
#Time is an illusion perpetrated by the manufacturers of space.
#To be safe, make a copy of everything before you destroy it.
#To err is human. To admit it is a blunder.
#To err is human. To forgive is unusual.
#To err is human; to forgive is Not Company Policy.
#To generalize is to be an idiot. -- William Blake
#To keep milk from turning sour, you should keep it in the cow.
#Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
#Tomorrow looks like a good day to sleep in.
#Too much of a good thing is WONDERFUL. -- Mae West
#Truthful: Dumb and illiterate.
#Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.
#TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.
#Twenty percent of zero is better than nothing. -- Walt Kelly
#Two heads are more numerous than one. -- Tom Weller
#Two wrongs are only the beginning. -- Kohn
#Under every stone lurks a politician. -- Aristophanes
#Unmatched: Almost as good as the competition.
#Volcano: A mountain with hiccups.
#Wagner's music is better than it sounds. -- Mark Twain
#Waste not, get your budget cut next year.
#We are all self-made, but only the rich will admit it.
#We are sorry. We cannot complete your call as dialed.
#We have met the enemy, and he is us. -- Walt Kelly
#We will cross out that bridge when we come back to it later.
#Wealth: The ability to support debt.
#Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise. -- John Heywood
#What happens when you cut back the jungle? It recedes.
#What if there were no hypothetical situations?
#What orators lack in depth they make up in length.
#What scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch? -- J. D. Farley
#What use is magic if it can't save a unicorn? -- Peter Beagle
#Whatever you want to do, you have to do something else first.
#When angry, count four; when very angry, swear. -- Mark Twain
#When evolution is outlawed, only outlaws will evolve.
#When in doubt, lead trump.
#When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.
#When it comes to helping you, some people stop at nothing.
#When it's you against the world, bet on the world.
#When it's you against the world, bet on the world.
#When management wants your opinion, they will give it to you.
#When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws.
#When pigs back into an electric fence, there is a short circus.
#When the going gets tough, everyone leaves. -- Lynch
#When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
#When working hard, be sure to get up and retch every so often.
#When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.
#When you dial a wrong number you never get a busy signal.
#When you've seen one non-sequitar, the price of tea in China.
#When your memory goes, forget it!
#Where is Denver? Denver is just below the O in Colorado.
#Where there is a will, there is an Inheritance Tax.
#Where there's a whip there's a way.
#Where there's a will, there's a relative.
#Which is worse, ignorance or apathy? Who knows? Who cares?
#Why did the politician cross the road? To get to the middle.
#Why doesn't life come with subtitles?
#Why don't "minimalists" find a shorter name for themselves?
#Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
#Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
#Why isn't "phonetic" spelled the way it's said?
#Why was I born with such contemporaries? -- Oscar Wilde
#Why would anyone want to be called Later?
#Winning isn't everything, but losing isn't anything.
#With a rubber duck, one's never alone.
#Without life, Biology itself would be impossible.
#Women who desire to be like men, lack ambition.
#Work is the curse of the drinking class.
#Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down.
#Years of development: We finally got one to work.
#Yesterday was the deadline on all complaints.
#Yield to temptation; it might not pass your way again.
#You are here. But you are not all there.
#You are not paranoid if they're really after you...
#You are warm and giving toward others. What are you after?
#You aren't a real engineer until you make one $50,000 mistake.
#You can observe a lot just by watchin'. -- Yogi Berra
#You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
#You cannot buy beer; you can only rent it.
#You won't skid if you stay in a rut. -- Frank Hubbard
#Your true value depends entirely on what you are compared with.
#Your weight is perfect for your height -- which varies.
#Youth is too good to be wasted on the young. -- G. B. Shaw
#[Nuclear war]... may not be desirable. -- Edwin Meese III